14 September 2015

RE: We're Giving You Half a Billion Dollars to Spend on Pop Culture.Don't F*ck It Up.



Heather sent me this as I was leaving Friday. I gave it a quick glance and knew I had to read the whole thing in it's entirety. It was more than a pleasant surprise when I opened it up this morning considering I'm sleepy and fighting an oncoming cold.

The premise is simple: You have 500,000,000.00 "to spend on whatever entertainment properties you choose". The only catch? 1. That's it's fictional. 2. You have to spend it all. The comments section on Pajiba is filled with all kinds of ideas so of course I had to take my shot at it.

Feel free to chime in but beware: I am fully and readily prepared to debate your ideas ad nauseum. Also, I didn't think too hard on the budgets so I don't wanna hear that something isn't enough money. Money is money dammit.
  • $200 M – A big screen adaptation of Spider-Man: Kraven’s Last Hunt
  • $45 M – Renew Better Off Ted on Netflix
  • $45 M – A final season of My Name Is Earl
  • $35 M – Film based on the Granite Mountain Hotshots which I just read about in my GQ from 2013 this morning
  • $35 M – Finance the big screen adaptation of my friend Derrick’s first Dillon book, Dillon And The Voice Of Odin
  • $30 M – One more true final season of 24
  • $20 M – A buddy comedy starring Donald Faison and Zach Braff
  • $20 M – 1 more season of Backstrom
  • $20 M – An Emma Stone/Jennifer Lawrence film
  • $20 M – Jenny Slate/Zach Galifianakis action comedy
  • $15 M – A sequel to the 1995 Super Nintendo game Chrono Trigger in the exact same 16-bit style with new tech where necessary for all gaming systems
  • $15 M – An Indiana Jones animated series

2 comments:

  1. $200M on an adaptation of Alfred Bester's THE STARS MY DESTINATION
    $45M on a reboot of the MISFITS OF SCIENCE TV show for Netflix
    $45M on a FORTUNE McCALL series for Netflix
    $35M for an all black musical version of CITIZEN KANE with the score written by Nile Rodgers, Stevie Wonder and Pharrell.
    $35M for a big screen adaptation of DILLON AND THE LAST RAIL TO KHUSRA
    $30M for a real second season of THE HUMAN TARGET that would ignore the bullshit second season and return to the style of the first.
    $20M for BETTER IN THE DARK: THE MOVIE starring James Spader as Thomas Deja and Andre Braugher as Derrick Ferguson
    $20M: for a documentary about New Pulp
    $20M for a remake of FREEBIE & THE BEAN starring Taraji P. Henson and Pam Grier
    $20M to develop a brand new version of the ETERNAL CHAMPIONS video game.
    $15M for an animated SEBASTIAN RED series

    ReplyDelete
  2. That will give us 2 Dillon movies!

    And I'll give you an extra 100 M just to guarantee that the Better In The Dark film gets made!

    ReplyDelete

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